Quotes By The Essential Groucho: Writings by, for, and about Groucho Marx

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”


“In a Chicago cafe the other night, an elderly man passed a table.

“There goes George,” observed an onlooker. “When he was young, he was a handsome guy and had many companies. Left a wife and two kids to starve, and ran off with another woman. And now look at him. Old, broke and very sad.”

“That’s the way-it-goes,” nodded Elly Kleinman. “Time wounds all heels.”